From a Journal 23 Years Ago.
Recently I was asked to find a journal I kept when we met twenty-three years ago. In it, I found a passage in which I wrote about a dream I…
Airline Captain – A Quick Study
I wrote the following years ago as a character study on a Captain I was flying with. I was hesitant to post it then as I genuinely enjoyed working with…
Hey Dad. On My Late Father’s Birthday
Hey Dad, So much has happened since we last spoke in January 2017. Your grandson has doubled in age since then; he's now 14. With each milestone of his, I…
Straight Conversion Therapy
In a surprise move, Doctor Henderson of Manhattan's faith-based "Restore Heterosexuality - Gay Conversion Center" has decided to turn 180 degrees and is now offering a heterosexuality conversion course. "The…
The Captain and His Shark Skin Boots
Airline crews are easy to identify at the hotel bar. Especially if it’s closing time when the lights are bright, and the staff is attempting to clean for the morning.…
Jack Hanna was Once Disappointed with Me
I had the great fortune of interacting many times with Jack Hanna over the years during my childhood through my father’s work with Busch Gardens in Tampa and later, SeaWorld…
The Flight When Our Passengers Decided to Drive
There was a time when being a Regional Pilot meant you never left the very small region your employer flew in. Often this was no larger than a thumbprint on…
All Work and No Play
On this one-hundred-and-something-ish day of being a virtual school teacher's assistant, IT support, lunch lady, PE Coach, and Dad I'm finding myself talking more and more to myself. The virtual…
Spring 2020 Is the Year Our Son Grew Up
Yes, his hair has gotten too long with the barbers closed so he suddenly looks like a broody teenager but with the all the news and his adult questions about…
Some Pilots Just Know It All
There are a few ways people can make money flying airplanes around. The two big easy examples are flying people or flying boxes to people. I've never considered the latter…
My Magic Shoes
By: The Young Stork This morning I went downstairs and found a pair of magic shoes. They were yellow with blue stripes and when I put them on they made…
I Got Five Stars for Being on Time
In the hotel van after work, I told my Captain that my son’s teacher gave me a compliment when I showed up to volunteer in class on time by acknowledging…
Our Little Boy Still Believes In The Bunny… Sort Of.
It’s increasingly less often these days but every now and then something happens that reminds me that he’s still my little baby. Like the other day when the very young…
My Yelp Review… An Embarrassing Hotel Shower
As a frequent guest of hotel showers across the United States, you can imagine the horror and disgust I felt while attempting to bathe in room 383 today. After…
I’ve gone from “Dad” to “Dude.”
I’ve gone from “Dad” to “Dude.” Although sometimes he keeps it in the family and calls me “Bro.” As in, “Dude! Bro! You don’t know how to dance the Floss?!…
My Father Will Forever Watch Over The Florida Aquarium
I was humbled to be able to take part in the unveiling of an incredible statue honoring my father at the Florida Aquarium this week in Tampa. The Aquarium commissioned…
Approaching the One Year Anniversary of My Father’s Passing
My father was dying this time last year. I knew it. He knew it. We all did. The difference though was that he handled the news so much better than…
A Pro and Con to Having Just One Child.
Pro: You only have one mouth to feed. Con: That same mouth often only has one person to talk to. I am his entertainment. I am his captive audience. I…
On Grieving
After our son was born I called friends who already had kids and apologized to them for not being more excited for them when they became parents. I didn't know…
Teaching Irony through Sarcasm
I have the luxury of working weekends and being able to pick up our son from school most weekdays. I watch with joy as he bounces down the steps…
My Father’s Eulogy
My father passed away on January 2nd of this year. I've had several posts in mind but haven't had the energy to put them down. This is the eulogy I…
A 1980 Tampa Tribune Article Featuring My Father on Parenting
By BESS ADAMS COLEMAN "With my 5-year-old son, I'm experiencing the greatest love affair I’ve ever had,” said 31-year-old Thom Stork. "There are lots of rocky roads, no question about…
No longer an Airline Captain and I’ve Lost My Mojo
I’ve been an airline Captain since 2001. With a recent airline change I’m a First Officer again. The copilot. Just like Kareem Abdul-Jabar… and the guy who sat next to Sully.…
Avoiding the Dad Stereotype
Mr. Mom (1983) Directed by Stan Dragoti Shown: Michael Keaton Mr. Mom (1983) Directed by Stan Dragoti Shown: Michael Keaton It’s been nearly seven years that I became a dad.Seven…
Are We Still Putting Soap in Their Mouths?
Are we still doing the soap in the mouth thing? I may need to go out and buy a bar of soap. Better yet. Amazon Prime. Soap please. We use…
At 16 I Had No Muscles But I Drove a Muscle Car
I recently read Auto Biography by Earl Swift in which he retraces all the owners of a '57 Chevy and it's had me thinking about my first car. It was a…
Rambling With Flashcards
We recently upped the ante on our nightly single sight word flashcard routine. After recognizing the word on the card before him the boy has to use that word in…
Time… According to a Child
How amazing it must be to have no concept of time? How liberating. Plotting our sons growth alongside the chart of mankind’s evolution, he is close to understanding…
Appropriate (and Inappropriate) Holiday Gifts for Your Flight Crew
It's the season for gift giving. That means it's also the season for scrambling to pay off your guilt by dishing out gifts to those who serve you and make…
This Christmas… He’s a Believer
This is his fifth Christmas and this year he’s a believer. We took him to see Santa last week. We went to the good one. The Friday night Mall Santa.…
National Adoption Month. Where Do Storks Come From?
“Father?” Said the almost five year old. “Listen, there is something I’ve been thinking about. You and I have been watching a lot of classic television programing lately. Shows like…
Future Daddy Blogger Support Group
The meetings are held in the basement of a church near an all-night donut shop. Although both are helpful, the location is more about the donuts than the man upstairs.…
His First Joke
For the first time in his life he has come up with something funny. Months later he still calls back to it. And it is funny.He’s had funny moments before.…
My Son. My Chronological Yardstick
Every memorable event in my life that happened before the spring of 2010 is filed away in my brain with a five-year buffer. My mental calendar from the era before…
What I Did Not Do During My Summer Vacation
I was on vacation during the month of July. I ceased all work related activities. I also didn’t… Read a USATODAY Eat airport food Shave Tell a passenger their flight…
How Hollywood Gets Airline Life Wrong
In many ways… Hollywood’s depiction of airline life is completely wrong. In some ways it’s spot on and I claim those scenes as just another day at the office. My…
Captain Dad – I Called Maintenance Control for a Toy Helicopter
My work life and home life collided yesterday when my son complained that his toy Hess helicopter wasn’t working as it was supposed to. “My helicopter won’t fly anymore!” It…
The Things You Find in Hotel Beds
Do not read this if you are in a hotel bed. If you are in a hotel bed please tell me you removed the bedspread. Please tell me you didn’t…
On Father’s Day
I used to give lip service on Father's Day. Cards were sent and thanks were given and the love was spread around as abundantly and efficiently as I could spread…
Eat, Sleep, Fly
Sometimes people ask me what it's like to be a pilot. "Wow, that must be so cool! I bet you're really smart. You must have been good at math in…
The Beat Poets Taught Me How to Talk to a Four Year Old
Many days during my college decade were spent studying the Beat Poets and experimenting with stream-of-consciousness prose. We turned words cut from the newspapers into dialog and had nonsense talks…
He Already Thinks He’s Smarter Than Me
He's only four and he already thinks he's smarter than I am. He's learned how to give the look that says, “Seriously? I wasn't born yesterday you know?” I give…
On Fatherhood: Almost 40 With a 4 Year Old
How different his world is in 2014 than mine was when I was his age in 1978. This is the blessing of the late blooming father. Had I begun the…
The Time I Told an Aviation Icon I Didn’t Have a Business Card
Filed away years ago as, “Well, that sure was stupid.” Once, I met Southwest founder and former CEO, Herb Kelleher in the airport. We talked at length and I got…
Is the First Officer Actually a Pilot?
Since the beginning, there have always been two pilots up on the flight deck. Had it not been for the Wright Brothers, maybe we'd only have one seat up there.…
What You Should Not Ask Your Flight Crew
We obviously spend lots of time around the humans. We are in the service industry after all. Day in and day out we spend our time carrying you, your loved…
Living in Hotels – It’s Us or The Bedbugs
I spend about ten nights a month in hotels. I’ve been doing this job for fourteen years. I’ve slept (or attempted to sleep) in a hotel bed roughly 1700 times…
I Fear My Son Will Think I Don’t Read
I fear my son will think I don't read... or listen to music... or vacuum since that task has been assigned to the robot. It's been years since I bought…
The Storks are Nesting
I just turned 39 and I may have begun nesting. I suppose this typically happens before the child is born but maybe since having him I’ve become aware of what…
But They Do Have Free Breakfast
When I was a young airline pilot and new to ‘the road’ I ranked hotels by their proximity to good food and entertainment. Now, I judge hotels on two things:…
Though We May Not Share Blood
Since his birth in 2010, I’ve wondered when we would start seeing our traits in him. Without the blood bond biological children share with their parents I’ve been anxious to…
Why it is Imperative you Land a Pilot
This article was floating around Facebook today explaining why it is imperative you land a pilot. 6 reasons to be exact. Since I am a pilot, I figured I’d explain…
You Say You Want A Revolution?
There will certainly be a time in our son's life where he will think he is cooler than us and rebel against the way we chose to raise him. He…
It Puts the Lotion on the Skin or Possible Parenting Fail.
For a few years now (well, specifically since January 2010), I've been quoting a particular scene from a particular horror movie during a particular time in the post-bath pre-story time…
Automated Chicken Coop 2.0 – Off the Grid
Years back, when my wife said she wanted chickens, I agreed as long as I could build the coop. Actually, I said no for years and finally caved when I…
We Tried to Sell Our College
It's been twenty years since I was a college student, and I returned this past weekend as an alumnus to preach the airline life. These kids on campus now are…
Thomas the Tank Engine in “Just Say No to Drones”
It was a bright and sunny day on the island of Sodor, and all the trains were running on time except for one. Thomas the Tank Engine sat with his…
Being a Pilot is Ruining Me
I'm not gonna go into all the obvious hazards of flying likes skin cancer, alcoholism, divorce and controlled flight into terrain. Those have been covered before. It's the day to…
2013 resolutions. The cockpit will be a happier place.
As the new year approaches it's time to evaluate accomplishments from the past year and set goals for the next. While I succeed each year with many of my Xbox-related…
Yes, Here Comes the Story of the Hurricane
In Florida, before man made global climate change, we had hurricane drills in grade school. We'd learn where the best place to hide was and how to skin, cook and…
Eight Years Ago We Wed – Since Then, I Became an Adult
For years now (more than a decade of them) a friend and I have been playing the “who’s the first to become an adult game”. It started in college and…
It’s My Potty, You Can Cry If You Want To
"The rules are pretty simple: tell me when you have to go potty, and we will go potty. Got it?" I say this at 8 a.m., feeling confident I'm gonna…
Folks, It will Be Yet Another Hour Before We Depart.
Some days, I actually do work. But it’s not the work you would assume. It’s not fighting nasty storms or battling wind shear down the final approach to an icy…
I May Be A Jedi Now
In order to get into the Mumbai airport, you need a boarding pass. You must present this to the bearded man with the gun and the second gun in the…
To Goa With Love
With the luxury of non-revenue travel also comes the joy of spontaneous adventure. Our trip to India would begin with either a flight from Newark into Delhi or Mumbai. We…
Six Pound Challenge – Failed!
In high school, I could eat! I was a growing boy, always hungry and never gaining weight. I felt invincible, or so I thought. There was (and maybe still is)…
He is Chasing Planes Around Already
The boy has the aviation bug. He has already begun chasing planes around. I've been doing it for as long as I can remember. Specifically, it may have started when…
My Days are now in Song
I've been home for too long and apparently have had too few conversations with adults. I've been off for a few weeks and have spent the majority of that time…
For a Moment, I Was a TV dad. And not a cool one.
Yep, go to commercial. For a moment I was a TV dad. Unfortunately, I wasn't the cool dad or the quirky gay dad or the tough guy. I was the…
Pacita Jugo Ladd… “Nana”
My Nana passed away on February 13th, surrounded by her family, after being diagnosed with cancer just a few weeks before. She passed very peacefully and kept her wit until…
$#*! my son’s caterpillar doesn’t say
Several times between now and the era of the stage 2 Huggie overnight diapers, I've fallen down the rabbit hole of sleep deprivation, awakening in the land of disproportionate proportions…
Catholic School made me a Sinner
I put in twelve years of Catholic school... I was released on my own recognizance but served parole under the watchful eyes of a Baptist college. You could say I…
If you watch enough daytime TV… you will get cramps
The boy is almost nine months old, and since I've been back to work after paternity leave, I've been flying weekends. Although airport Chick-fil-A is closed on Sunday, it is…
Mornings in a Hotel: “Where am I? What Time is it?”
A friend once told me that every day he wakes up in a hotel, it feels like waking up with a hangover. "I'm not sure where I am or how…
Returning from vacation – time to catch up on the news
I returned to work yesterday from a three-week vacation with the family. While at work and living on the road, I have lots of downtime that I fill with 'entertainment'…
How Indiana Jones Has Made Me a Better Father
When the baby falls asleep in my arms, I recreate this old scene in reverse as I do my best to place him in the crib and extract my arms…
Maybe cribs should come with a flight attendant call button
In the cockpit, when an alarm sounds, the first response is to “Identify and Cancel” the warning. This means acknowledging the source of the alarm, silencing the warning, and then…
I Made a Burrito and Forgot to Shave
My job as a pilot is made much easier by checklists and routines. I do the same thing - the same way - every time. Checklists are written in a…
I hate the phrase “knock on wood”
I despise the phrase "Knock on wood." It was only ever tolerable when sung by The Mighty Mighty Bosstones. If you're among those in the cockpit who've said, "I've never…
My own sensory deprivation chamber… with music.
For years, I’ve used Pink Floyd's 1968 studio album "A Saucerful of Secrets" as my secret weapon for an instant nap when I wasn’t sure if my brain was up for a break or there was too much going on around me to ensure a solid sleep.
Google Voice Poetry
I started using Google Voice months back on my G1 Android phone to transcribe my voicemails. When you leave me a message, I get an email containing the text version…
My short career as Chris Winston – Overnight Disk Jockey
After college, or maybe it was during, I had a job for about a year as an overnight DJ at an adult contemporary AM radio station in Southern Virginia. Actually,…
My failed attempt at dog whispering
I was driving home today and saw a dog running around the neighborhood a few blocks from my house. Being the good neighbor and dog owner that I am, I…
My dream of having a band of minstrels.
On days when the air is still and fog forms over a river, it looks like the Great Wall of China is snaking its way across the Earth. Since many…
Since storms cancelled our evening with The Flaming Lips – I had to go to Youtube.
Well, The Flaming Lips show in Philadelphia turned into “A bit of a bath - a big bath” (to quote the Woodstock documentary - although theirs was in reference to…
Alert the pitcrew, we’re coming for more fuel
I showed up in DC for a 5:30 AM flight to Kansas City, followed by a flight to Milwaukee where I faced a 3.5-hour layover in the airport before our…
Holds and diverts and storms, oh my.
This was our third leg for the day. We began in Omaha around 2 PM, flew from Omaha to Milwaukee, and then off to Boston. On the return from Boston…
I never got many Gold Medals – But I used to make them.
I once quit a job without giving two weeks' notice. I quit after my lunch break. The boss wasn’t surprised at all. I think she even wondered why it took…
Lost and Found – Mixtape in the gutter from “Yo Boy Billy”
Press Play I found this CD in the gutter up the street the other day while out walking the dog. Apparently, Emily has moved on. The disk may have fallen…
I got some lip from a ROBOT
I called to check on room availabilities at a few hotels in Towson for my parents' visit next month. Google, of course, gave me a few pushpins just a few…
6 hours ahead to 3 hours behind
On Woensdag (Wednesday), we left Amsterdam for Reno. Well, we attempted to leave Amsterdam for Reno. The daily Usairways flight from AMS to PHL was full and rather than roll…
My childhood “Boy named Sue” moment
In grade school, we wore navy blue pants and white dress shirts. The boys had triangular collars, while the girls wore the rounded ones that little Catholic school girls wear.…
saves the day – saves the dog
Who knows... it's noon and I hear someone yelling from outside our boat. It's in Dutch of German or something I can't place because I'm asleep. I say, "what... huh?…
Assimilation
The whole houseboat is IKEA! We're in a neighborhood a bit outside of Central Amsterdam. Although it's only a 30-minute walk or an easy tram or bus ride into the…
The summer of fun just got ‘funner’
With her off for the summer, I 'bid' to have some weeks off with her. I was awarded six weeks from the end of June through early August. Eager to…
Simpsons – opening night
We went to the opening night of The Simpsons Movie. THE opening night. The midnight showing at select theaters. First of all—movie = awesome. But it was the crowd that…
The accidental peacemaker
I often watch in amazement as gate agents in airports can so blatantly blow off our passengers in their time of need. I know there are plenty of times when…
I’m thankful for warm lemonaide and chicken.
A four-day trip the week of Thanksgiving took me to Columbus, Ohio. Since I was to spend the holiday alone in the hotel, S. decided to drive up from visiting…
I was a Nintendo Fanboy at Five AM
I got to Walmart at 4:30 am armed with a large coffee and my hacked PSP, ready to play an hour and a half of ExciteBike on a Nintendo emulator…
What’s on my dock
As friends make the jump from windows to mac - I often get asked what mac apps to use? Where are some good places to get software? What's in your…