My job as a pilot is made much easier by checklists and routines. I do the same thing – the same way – every time.
Checklists are written in a way that is intended to flow logically as we set up the cockpit for each phase of flight. It’s the times when something upsets that flow that checklist items are missed. You’re midway through a taxi checklist, and a radio call breaks the cadence of the “challenge and response,” and it’s easier (and safer) to start over rather than stumble back into it.
My life has become a series of checklists. I’m not sure if I was made for aviation or if a career in aviation has made me the way I am. When I’m on a trip, each day I do the same thing – the same way – every time. My evening ritual in the hotel has been modified slowly over the years to become the most efficient it can be. I check into my room and immediately strip the garnish bedspread off the bed and lay out my clothes for the next morning. Regardless of how long I have in the hotel, I get ready for the next day by setting two alarms on my phone, one on the hotel clock, and a phone wake-up call. Each of these alarms is set for 1 minute apart, beginning 45 minutes before we are to meet for the van. I write the city name and tomorrow’s day of the week on the hotel key envelope and put it next to the alarm clock. The rest of the night, like a Roomba vacuuming robot, I mindlessly walk through a series of preprogrammed routines. Hopefully, this involves some Seinfeld.
The same precision takes place during the morning events. Nothing gets skipped, and nothing gets forgotten. Until there’s a change to the routine. A shower that won’t get hot or a broken coffee maker. I recently introduced a lunch box to the program. I’ve become a lunch box guy. I pack 4 days’ worth of food on ice and make meals-to-go in my room for a picnic at 30,000 feet… without the blanket or ants. It’s not as much about saving money as it is about getting so freaking sick and tired of Sbarro pizza and Wok-n-Roll fried stuff with soy sauce.
With the introduction of the lunch box, I’m all out of whack. Yesterday, although I made some excellent burritos out of Trader Joe’s Chickenless Chicken Strips, I forgot to shave. Having to get ice from the ice machine for my lunch box threw off my whole program! While showering, I debated when to work ice retrieval into the equation. Should I do it before or after I put on my tie? This internal argument must have carried on into the “it’s now time to shave” portion of the ceremony, and I overlooked it while I debated maybe just getting ice on the way out the door with all my luggage.
Years ago, I left the keys to my car in the cockpit of the airplane I just gave to another crew and realized this as I watched them taxi towards the runway. Naturally, this happened because I just bought a new suitcase and hadn’t decided yet which pocket to store my keys in. I had it down to a science with my old suitcase but had yet to find a convenient spot for them in the new one. I opted to keep them in my pants pocket until resolving this crisis, but then they kept stabbing my thigh, so I set them in the cup holder. Off to STL they went without me.
Tonight, I may use a spreadsheet to map out a new routine for tomorrow morning’s ice-gathering mission. But by doing so, I’ll probably forget to brush my teeth before bed.
