Our Lady of Perpetual Leaks

Forget our Lady of Lourdes or the wailing wall… I think it’s about
time we consecrate our shower. It’s a miracle of plumbing! If a vision
were to appear we’d name her Our Lady of Perpetual Leaks. This
plumbing wonder has been flowing for a year or so now. As a recovering
Catholic I’d go as far as to call it holy water.
We’ve had numerous plumbers make the pilgrimage to our place all
leaving in various states of disbelief. Even “The City Papers Best
Plumber in Baltimore” scratched his head and said, “no charge. good
luck.” He ran out the door failing to genuflect but did make the sign
of the cross before getting in his car.

Of all the plumbers who’ve come by, only Mike’s Plumbing has returned
for a follow-up.
“More Caulk” is the standard diagnosis.
And caulked i’ve done.
“I’ve caulked the shit out of it.” I reply.
“I’m on the case.”
This time Mike is on the job. No lacky is man enough for this one.

I’m hoping tomorrow’s visit is from a priest.
An exorcism is what we may need.

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